theres no fucking way i was ever going to wait around while you chased a truth that you made up in your head. you can idealize every piece of trash that floats through your life as a message from god- but its fucking not and you dont get to waft in and out of everyones lives just because you think youre following moses across the red sea. youre just running. and drowning and i cant fucking save you if you think youre flying.
-he was trash, and so was the guy before him
Tag: love
my arms are sore from holding this heavy heart
i want nothing
but to drop it
so that i can hold yours instead
love is long distance
and the sadness of a friend
A.
Becoming me was easy
with you
My body lives to do
those things you want it to
It was so beautiful
to watch it happen
In my head
But to look down upon it
my skin could grow
and shrink and stretch
and harden and turn
into dirty playdough
While your body stayed the same
while less and less
I heard you say my name
with endearment
Like my name became
a command and
all the love it once had
drained out if it
Like we twisted and tangled it
until we rang everything out
and sat it aside to dry
We all know why
we siphoned the love out
and poured it all down
in such bounty
We gave it to the creation
of our bodies
and our blood
while our love
dried on the counter
with yesterdays dishes
love after children
A.
Dear God,
you are a fire
a small, flickering ember
but that ember lights a forest
and a few houses
that surround it
Dear God,
youre fuckin cold
ice blackened on the road
youre the screams
as the car rolls
Dear God,
youre the flatline
while everybodies shaking
looking up and waiting
folding hands and praying
Dear God,
forgive me
for i have sinned
but you created this
why dont you let it end?
why would you mold
the whole world
and tell me i cant live
make me say your name
is it a fetish or a game?
A.
isnt it about fucking time to stop writing memoirs of the men who broke us A.
i was your sunshine when skies were gray
but when the skies cleared
you called me “rain”
you can’t hide love
between the folds
of your sheets
you can’t pin
my heart
to your bed
no matter how
hard you shake me
only tears will fall
– the rest is mine to keep
Memoirs of a Millennial 